Just when you thought you had seen and heard it all….THIS pops up.
Billy Joel’s daughter….Alexa or something unoriginal like that…..let’s say the daughter that you have never heard about nor has anyone ever heard about for that matter. Well, daddy Billy thinks she needs a body guard.
Now allegedly Alexa or what ever her name REALLY is has a stalker…finally SOMEONE who knows about this chick (the stalker…stay with me), and that stalker was found naked in the woods.
Billy, who was walking in the woods looking for naked stalkers as he normally does just happened upon this man, stalking his daughter….in the woods…naked.
Sooooo was she in the woods too? Does she live in the woods? Are the woods a meca for stalkers? I would assume both..although I gave 3, and that is why we have never heard of her before, she hangs out in the woods….well, that is MY side of the story anyway, which is much better than the official version.
So, this naked man….let’s call him Ron…don’t you just always have a weird feeling about men named Ron? So Ron…just go with it, was stalking Alexa on Facebook….what else do you do on Facebook come on people.
Now, this is where the story really really gets WEIRD, because I am totally just assuming this is how it all went down.
Ron, (that stalker guy remember) was looking on Facebook for someone he had never every heard of before….try it, type in “people I never heard of before” Alexa Joel always comes up.
Anyway, he was looking to stalk anyone…literally anyone obviously, and thought to himself “how cool i’d be to do it neked in the woods..heheheh”.
I think I remember a Billy Joel song that was pretty darn similar to this situation the “Piano Man” song….actually that is the ONLY Billy Joel song I can think of…and you could too admit it.I know you had to think about it for a second, and Piano Man was the best you could do.
If you know more than 2 Billy Joel songs you are way too old and need a life, and not a Facebook life either…that is for stalkers remember?
Maybe there was foreshadowing in his song? It has happened before….I think, probably has, should have happened at least once anyway. So before you cast doubt and say “this was terrible” just ponder the assumption that just maybe Billy brought this on his never heard of before daughter in the first place.
It can happen people……maybe.
I REALLY think what happened was the Joker from the Batman movie was pissed off because her smile is wayyyyy more jokery (gotta be a word) than his was in the movie.
A thought, let’s cast Alexa for the next joker movie (refer to picture above to agree with me on this….just do) and that way we all would know who this girl is and why we should really care, although I personally would not care…that much, maybe just a little because I am a nice guy and give people a chance and all, but you are pushing it.
Give things a few days to make the headlines and I would BET big money that we find out that the stalker was the Joker, naked in the woods….with a candle stick.
If YOU have heard of Alexa Joel before please please comment….and give us a darn good reason why we should believe you.
Done in satire and parody to make you say…”why did I read that”

